Settling back into Massachusetts, and other Updates
Hola Amigos! If you made it here from my last blog, welcome! Thank you for your patience, and I’m so glad to have you back!
If you’re new here, thank you for deciding to check my work out! I hope you find something in my writing that brings you enjoyment.
While I haven’t been blogging much, I have been travelling and still doing a little bit of writing. I take ample time to process things after the fact, and will hopefully have some stuff out about Peru, eventually.
And I’ll work on importing all of my blogs from andyark.com into here for continuity’s sake.
For now,
you can check out my new collection of poetry here,
and enjoy a blog post about how I spent my time unemployed in Belchertown, Massachusetts, below:
November —> Early December, 2023
At the beginning of November, I quit the Real Estate business that I had been spending 10-20 hours a week on for the past 18 months, and recently dropped $4500 into.
I dropped out of school at the beginning of this year and that held a similar feeling. It was stressing me out, stripping my time and confidence, and not giving much in return.
Ahorita, I have no degree, no business, and until very recently no job.
I have nothing to stand on anymore. Yet I feel lighter and more free than ever.
That time in Peru (October 7-23), and then from November 15th to December 12th, was the first time since Summer 2020 where I had no work or school for more than a few days.
It was a strange number of days.
I would stay up late daydreaming crazy schemes or writing or cooking furiously then sleep in until 10 or 11–when the sun was high enough in the sky to be at its brightest after the calm orange glow of the early hours–and sit in its slanted rays shining across my front porch–cars speeding by off to work I assume or maybe grocery shopping–holding dearly in two chilly hands a coffee I had brewed fresh on a white plastic V60 pour over spout into my dark green “2018 Columbus Coffee Festival Mug” Micah had gotten for me that was just big enough to fit a 300 ml pour with an inch of space at the top, but sometimes I would sit instead with a cigarette fresh from a pack and–on rare occasion–a hand-rolled spliff (that’s tobacco and weed) first thing in the morning sitting smoking thinking about food and women (my two greatest loves in life) out in the sun so long, in fact (this really happened), my roommate declared “your nose is so red!” from a combination I think of both a sunburn and the cold winter air. I started to put on sunscreen in the morning!
After that, I would be up to all sorts of other shenanigans.
My roommates: Sinbad, Horace, Heath, and Karl, are all students at the University of Massachusetts in Amherst, a 10 minute drive north of where we live. Jorge is my 5th roommate, but I don't see him very often as he lives closer to Boston most of the time.
When I wasn’t sunbathing like a fat cat, I’d be sitting at the dining table at the bed of the stairs that led up to the bedrooms, and see them all rush off to class in the morning.
Sinbad was first. I’d see her anywhere from 6:30 am to 10 am (depending on when I got up) to work as a Nurse Assistant, at a bagel sandwich shop downtown Amherst, or to go to class or the library to study.
Then Horace, at the earliest 11 and sometimes closer to 2, would always sleep in until just before class and rush in to eat breakfast with his backpack on. He likes to keep his backpack on–even when coming back from class he’ll wear it around in the kitchen. The day-old bagels that Sinbad brought home from work were the source of breakfast for the both of us.
Then there’s Karl, a Civil Engineer, who I would usually chat with later in the day when he came back from campus sometime after 7pm. His girlfriend Hana lives in New York, but she spent a week at our place. So I had an extra roommate to chat with and say hi to for a little bit!
Everytime Heath left for the day she’d say something along the lines “I’m off to my suffering!” in allusion to studying at the library for her Microbiology and Chemistry classes. Eventually instead of telling her to “have a good day!” or “enjoy your day!” it turned into “I hope the suffering isn’t too bad today” and “good luck with the suffering!”
The last roommate, Jorge, is only around every other weekend or so. He works closer to Boston–Cambridge to be specific–as a sound engineer. He hits floors with a hammer and runs tests and equations on the resulting vibrations.
So I’d usually have a chat with one of them in the morning, or/and when they came back after their days. They were all busy, but because I was home and upstairs (my room is the basement) I’d be able to see all of them at different times.
I spent all day hanging out in the kitchen and living room so I’d try to take care of the dishes, keep the counters clean, sweep every now and then, and feed my roommates with leftovers.
I was stressed during my leave of absence from society.
Where was I going to work? What was I going to do for money? Can I really start a business? Am I going to become a private chef, write a blog, start a food truck, sell frozen dumplings, or open a bagel shop!? While the world felt like my oyster it was a big oyster both too large to slurp in one go and preemptively slathered in lemon juice and hot sauce.
But I did have some stuff to do. I spent time teaching the systems I built for the Real Estate business to my old partner and his new partner; I worked on my resume, sent emails, and drove around to different places applying for jobs; I tried to apply for unemployment payments and food stamps, and I even met with a career advisor to try and help figure out what the heck I wanted to do!
And inevitably–this happened 3 years ago too–I spent more and more time watching and thinking about politics, and asking myself questions.
What’s wrong with the world, what’s really wrong? What levers can I pull to make a real difference in the way things are right now? What does a healthy and sustainable future even look like, given what we have at the moment? Impossible questions to answer entirely but so much fun to think about!
Have you ever thought about saving the world?
I had my first idea when I was 11 or 12, while taking a hot shower. If I had enough money I could do anything I wanted, so that meant I could save the world.
If only it was that easy.
I also caught up on a lot of reading.
I love reading manga–japanese comic books.
Here’s a quote from one of my favorites: “Someone has to do it. Not a hero, not a god–just someone.”
It comes from a story about the Viking war with England around 1013 A.D. After growing up fighting in raids and wars, Thorfinn dreams of running away to a world with no war. The story chronicles his attempts to start a peaceful colony on the North American continent. The second main character is the son of a king, who after inheriting a war torn throne tries to create heaven on earth through bloody power and absolute rule over land and armies. It’s a philosophical read that wrestles with the inconsistencies of Christianity, war, and power, forcing the reader to think about what a single person can do to create peace on earth–and what peace even means starting from the suffering individual and expanding outward into larger power structures, relationships, and economic systems. Throughout the story Thorifinn tries to change from a blood soaked warrior into a kind and gentle man who solves problems through discussion and understanding, rather than with force–despite being an incredibly strong fighter. He inspires me!
Throughout everything cooking is my peace. If I ever felt stressed or chaotic or didn’t know how to spend my time, I’d drive to the grocery store and figure out something to make.
I’m really loving learning how to make Peruvian food.
Leche de Tigre is a Peruvian classic. It translates to Tiger’s Milk, and refers to the broth of raw fish and lime juice that marinates the national dish of Peru, Cebiche.
When making leche de tigre, it’s all about harnessing the essence of each ingredient, rather than extracting every last drop of flavor from them (as is the case in a lot of French cooking. For example when making caramelized onions, you brown them for color at a higher heat, then slowly cook them down to get their sweetness, and then salt in order to bring out the full flavor within; maybe adding some balsamic for acidity to complement and bring out more of the flavor of the onion. French cooking has very deep flavor profiles). With limes for example, I cannot simply half and squeeze the death out of the lime. You must cut the lime around the core, and only give each piece one squeeze–one!!!–in order to bring out the sweeter sourness of the lime and avoid the deeper bitterness. The leche is blended for 30-60 seconds, then briefly blended with cilantro and red onion for only 5 or so seconds. After that it’s pushed through a sieve–twice! And all the ingredients (except for a briefly simmered fish stock) are used raw! What this accomplishes is the extraction of only fresh essential flavors of each ingredient, and it creates a surprisingly delicate and absolutely delicious broth to compliment the nakedness of raw fish. It is a joy to learn about!
I have also made hundreds of dumplings recently. I love the peace and simplicity of spending an hour filling and crimping little perfect dumplings. I like eating them with a homemade chili oil that has delicate hints of Chinese spices and a spicy kick that comes in slow and late.
My break is now over,
and I feel energized and motivated to move my body and work! I do a few things, now; I’m a dishwasher at a fancy bar with high-end food; I am a barista at a modern specialty coffee shop; I help clean up after class at a local yoga studio in exchange for free classes; and I’m also doing this, I guess.
If you made it this far, thank you, really really, thank you so much. It means the world to me that somebody somewhere is reading this and getting something, anything, from it.
These are scary to post, and I don’t know if I’d be able to keep doing this without you.
Stay curious and full of joy, my friends!!
-Andy
